Ok - so now I've got your attention I will clarify! - I've been told that as a business, if you want people to become involved in your blog, you should be posting a new one roughly three times per week. Arghhhhh......surely not ?! How on earth do people manage it? I've plenty to say (as my friends and family will confirm!) its just finding the time.....hmmmmmmm....... time, I used to have some of that.
Since having children its the one of the few things in my life that seems to be missing - the time to just do whatever it is I want to do without having to make excuses for myself. At the moment, when I want a few minutes to myself, away from the manic noise that I live in, I can often be found in the toilet - its the only room with a lock on that the kids (or for that matter, my husband) cant get into - it could easily become my sanctuary!
Thinking about it the other day, however, I decided that rather than redecorate the loo and buy candles to improve the atmosphere, it may just be more appropriate to try to organise my time a bit more efficiently. Considering I run Time Management courses you would have thought I was an expert - isn't it easy though to talk the talk but then find yourself stumbling rather than walking the walk ! and so evolved my to do list.
It looked very impressive (it was only later i realised it would look more impressive if there were not so much on it !) Bit by bit I have got things done today - in fact having written it all down I realise just how much I do do. On other days I probably would have lamented at how little I had managed to complete. It was only seeing on paper that it was put into perspective. Just to give you a taste:
Wash, dress and feed two under fives
Drag a thirteen year old out of bed (with a strategically placed glass of water !)
Two packed lunches
Three school runs
One excuse for why I have not yet paid hideously expensive nursery
Complete all text for new website - going live beginning January!!!!
Call plain English speaking accountant (@amyaccountant) who was great btw.
Call @OnlyDads to discuss writing their Work section & becoming their Expert on Careers
Get all stationary ordered
Talk to another trainer who taught me all I know about training games (@MattSL)
Three school runs
One parents evening (so how come he is so naughty at home ?!?!)
One meal at a yummy carvery (diet can wait until next week !)
Home and kids to bed !!!!!
Dutifully watch some TV with Mr W
and then theres that three times a week lark!!!! (this blog, obviously !!)
Blimey - I've impressed myself ! It all got done. The thing is - we ALL do so much more than we realise - its only when we put pen to paper that we can see just how much. It reminds me of a wonderful mum who attended one of my workshops who said 'I don't really do much - I've got six kids' Arghhhhhhhhhhhhh !!!!
Point taken?
Monday, 23 November 2009
Saturday, 21 November 2009
and then there were blogs...and tennis balls !
For someone who loves writing and has more soap boxes than the average launderette I'm finding it surprisingly difficult to get going with my first post ! So.....bear with me folks until the literary juices start flowing.....I've been bringing up four children for far too long and my brain appears to have shrunk somewhat!
On the subject of bringing up children (aaaaand she's off I hear my husband and friends say at this point!!) I ran a Job Search course for a group of parents at a children's centre in South London the other day. We were due to start at 9.30am and having worked in Children's Centres and Sure Start since their introduction in around 2002 I was quite prepared for the late start due to parents settling their children in the creche (or perhaps it was the other way around and the children were waiting for their parents to settle!). Eventually at about 10am we all sat down and I was struck by two women in particular. Their bodies were in the room but their hearts and minds most definitely were nowhere to be seen......they had slipped back into the creche with their little ones.
Being a mum of four myself (all boys aged 23, 13, 5 & 2 - more about them another time !) I totally understood where they were coming from. It is so hard when you've never left your child with someone else. We talked for a good amount of time about how good it was for the children to learn to be with other people, how it would improve their confidence and language skills and how by taking time for themselves it would help them be better mothers. Obviously it all fell on deaf ears !
As a trainer, I realised that I had to find a way of getting those mums in the room with their minds as well as their bodies. I'm a true believer that training should be fun as well as informative so the tennis balls came out and a rather raucous round of group juggling ensued. Eight worried mums, minds in another room were warned that if they didn't concentrate they WOULD get hit by a ball. They looked a bit bemused (as do a lot of people on my courses !!!!) but decided they valued their safety and started becoming more aware of what was going on in our room rather than the creche.
I only wish I could have bottled the sound of their laughter and the complete abandonment of any sense of being a 'grown up'. For a few minutes they were all thinking of nothing else but having fun and being themselves....not someones mum or someones wife, or sister or friend....just being there, in the moment and not thinking about anything other than NOT getting hit by a flying tennis ball. Its so important that we all have those times. The benefits of returning to work for a parent go beyond the financial incentive (when there is one!)......its about reclaiming a little bit of 'me' time - being able to have a lunch break, being able to gossip in the office kitchen or perhaps even getting the time to post a blog on the quiet !
So - here's to all the parents who are being brave - leaving their children in the capable hands of childcare professionals in the hope of bringing something new into their lives.......and also to the children who are learning to trust that mum or dad WILL return after leaving them and that actually they may have loads of fun while they are away !
On the subject of bringing up children (aaaaand she's off I hear my husband and friends say at this point!!) I ran a Job Search course for a group of parents at a children's centre in South London the other day. We were due to start at 9.30am and having worked in Children's Centres and Sure Start since their introduction in around 2002 I was quite prepared for the late start due to parents settling their children in the creche (or perhaps it was the other way around and the children were waiting for their parents to settle!). Eventually at about 10am we all sat down and I was struck by two women in particular. Their bodies were in the room but their hearts and minds most definitely were nowhere to be seen......they had slipped back into the creche with their little ones.
Being a mum of four myself (all boys aged 23, 13, 5 & 2 - more about them another time !) I totally understood where they were coming from. It is so hard when you've never left your child with someone else. We talked for a good amount of time about how good it was for the children to learn to be with other people, how it would improve their confidence and language skills and how by taking time for themselves it would help them be better mothers. Obviously it all fell on deaf ears !
As a trainer, I realised that I had to find a way of getting those mums in the room with their minds as well as their bodies. I'm a true believer that training should be fun as well as informative so the tennis balls came out and a rather raucous round of group juggling ensued. Eight worried mums, minds in another room were warned that if they didn't concentrate they WOULD get hit by a ball. They looked a bit bemused (as do a lot of people on my courses !!!!) but decided they valued their safety and started becoming more aware of what was going on in our room rather than the creche.
I only wish I could have bottled the sound of their laughter and the complete abandonment of any sense of being a 'grown up'. For a few minutes they were all thinking of nothing else but having fun and being themselves....not someones mum or someones wife, or sister or friend....just being there, in the moment and not thinking about anything other than NOT getting hit by a flying tennis ball. Its so important that we all have those times. The benefits of returning to work for a parent go beyond the financial incentive (when there is one!)......its about reclaiming a little bit of 'me' time - being able to have a lunch break, being able to gossip in the office kitchen or perhaps even getting the time to post a blog on the quiet !
So - here's to all the parents who are being brave - leaving their children in the capable hands of childcare professionals in the hope of bringing something new into their lives.......and also to the children who are learning to trust that mum or dad WILL return after leaving them and that actually they may have loads of fun while they are away !
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